We’ve all wondered what exactly goes on in Scotland. Whether it’s the idea of a magical place filled with luscious terrain, or a hellscape with deranged druggies who wander the streets like Night of The Living Dead, there is some image that’s been made about Scotland in your mind.
We’re here to share with you the information coming straight from the horse’s mouth. These 75 posts coming from native Scottish folk are sure to entice you in every sense of the word. Prepare for utter vulgarity as it’s pretty common knowledge to know that Scottish people do not hold back. Sit back, pour some Scotch, and get ready for a ridiculously hilarious ride.
Well, that was straight-up brutal. Hopefully, the kid isn’t too hurt by such comments. It seems dad was already in a pissy attitude at the mere mention of “chicken pie for dinner”, so it wasn’t that surprising that we got a truth bomb exploded right in our faces.
Nevermind the occasion. The fact that he got a vacuum at bongos bingo setting is truly a ridiculous notion. There’s one lucky contestant that got his prize money and walked away with a great big smile.
Now, while this may seem trivial to some cultures, it is utter disrespect to those of the Islamic faith. The last part is what had us scratching our heads to some utter craziness. How did nobody catch this lunatic on the street waving a machete?
We won’t go into detail about what a “fanny” is, but let’s just say it’s not something very nice to say. Nothing new here since, After all, the Scots don’t bring a filter to their conversations. We’ll also appreciate the honesty in this person’s behavior that night
Apparently wifi now has the ability to remotely slow down a bus. At least that’s what this streetside homeless person claims. Never a dull moment when you’re around Scottish people.
A page from this person’s playbook would’ve been useful back in the day. Props for using math and allocating proper resources, but it was all in vain since the alcohol definitely killed some of this person’s neurons. This isn’t very surprising since Scotts do like their alcohol.
Things happen all the time and an ostrich on the loose in Ayrshire is no exception. You better have a fast pair of legs to catch this speed demon. Too bad they’re virtually impossible to catch on land since they can reach speeds of up to 60 mph. Unless you’re Scottish and have a fifth of alcohol ready to go!
Whether Scottish tweets have the style of trainspotting is yet to be seen. Our laughter just confirms that we wouldn’t change it for anything. Keep bringing more moments of humor Scottish people!
One thing the Scots are known for is their smack talk. If there’s one group of people you don’t want to get into a verbal spat with, it’s probably them. Even Yeezy can get in the line of fire for something totally unrelated to his line of shoes.
Scottish trying to do a Scottish accent? Sounds about right. Just don’t overdo it or you might never be able to undo your accent in normal conversations ever again.
Did we mention Scots know how to bring on the fire? If you can’t take the heat, it’s best to get out of the kitchen. Just don’t piss them off as they’ll bring anyone (including Houdini) to the conversation.
Awkard moments leave a dry taste in the mouth. This one was nothing short of bitter and definitely not sweet. Hopefully, the little boy wasn’t too offended since the comment came at him with good intentions.
Beeping at someone on the road might be the equivalent of trying to start something. It can really perturb someone if they don’t expect it coming their way. Just take a look at this beep reaction. Not a very happy camper indeed.
The Scots don’t play when it comes to giving respect. It’s in the history and context of actions worth noticeable, even if its based on the humble beginnings of a urinal. Don’t forget to pay those that came before the proper respect they deserve.
It’s important to build structure and order with your dog. Even if it means wearing an entire neon lime outfit and look obnoxious. Scotts will do anything to make sure they’re enjoying their day no matter the outfit or look they have about them.
Not sure where the enthusiasm in the humor comes in, but we’ll take that. A meal that is microwaved is obviously going to be a hot one, but for Scottish people, anything is hot as long as it goes through the appliance. A real jokester this guy is.
This A and B conversation definitely had a third wheel. Animals have the survival instincts and intuition to communicate in some odd form. Not sure what this Scottish person was thinking.
If werewolves exist in London, then were-bats might be a thing in Scotland. You’ll be amazed at all the gothic creatures that come out at night in the streets of the once Celtic area. Keep your wits about you while you tread in Scotland!
Sometimes it takes serious translation work to get through heavy Scottish slang. This is definitely one of those moments. A public service announcement to all Scottish folk: try to make it easier on us next time!
Profanity is part of the normal vernacular when it comes to Scottish tradition. Nothing says it more bluntly and directly than a few expletives for added dramatization. Don’t take it offensively next time a Scot decides to toss a bad word out for no reason whatsoever.
The string of family relatives involved in this post is enough to make you scratch your head. However these pups relate, it’s good to know they hold a prominent position in the family. Taking care of dogs and incorporating them into the family has always been a great trait of many Scottish families around the world.
Don’t be afraid to crack open a pack of hedgehogs. Only, make sure to finish your pack and not leave one behind like this one here. Scottish people will just scoff at you and make a funny joke about it without caring for animals rights
This is disturbing. Scotts are known for being experimental, but this is just anecdotal gold. The fact that it got to this point is telling of how open-minded Scottish society must be. Good luck getting all that bird information put to good use.
Somehow this was a valid entry on a voting card. And even more surprising, it actually got counted! Things are definitely different across the bond over in the U.K. Let’s hope things on that end of the spectrum are doing better than in the United States.
This is just utter ridiculousness. Does this type of stuff happen often in Scotland? At least one person found some humor and responded with what could be the greatest use of a pun in the last decade.
This Scot wasn’t down with the currency exchange rate. Who could blame him? A scoop of ice cream should not be worth 10 euros unless its the greatest scoop of ice cream in the world.
As harsh as it may sound, J.K. Rowling deserves some flack for her controversial comments. It’s best to leave it out in public so that way the message can resonate stronger. Leave it to the Scottish for a proper roasting worth reading.
There are many nice things one could say about the U.K. , but Scotland is definitely amongst the best. Or so this person believes. Based off of the multitude of bad words that get strung into a sentence, we’d like to think this person is right.
Not even a viral epidemic can handle going toe-to-toe against a person from Scotland. They’re mean, lean, and ready to handle anything. Just try and see what happens COVID!
Whoever said Scottish people don’t have a good sense of fashion? Clearly, they are mistaken since they do try to keep up with the latest fashion. Don’t listen to all of that outside noise if it doesnt back up the talk.
Keeping it simple has a new meaning for vegans in Scotland. Talk about getting the right meal with a Mars bar and croissant. At least this person has the option of no meat. Some places in America can’t guarantee that luxury.
Recognizing a crisper eater as a champion is a thing of prestige amongst the Scottish. It should be noted since they are quite tasty and great for competition. Not quite the Nathan’s Hot Dog contest, but it will have to do for now.
The comparison is actually hilarious. Scottish people are all about the liberties granted to the common folk. They yearn to live a life out of enslavement and are prepared to do just that when it comes to intimate relations.
Not sure what this person meant by the chippie menu, but we can imagine it would be something hard to read. Again, nobody is safe from the Scottish roasting line of fire. Not even ex first lady Melania Trump.
Little details are irrelevant to some Scottish people. Checkout this clock that was replaced by a pizza. The fact that his mom couldn’t tell the difference makes the joke even more funny.
Whatever pictures of Scotland you have, get it out of your hand. It’s a land of potty mouths and alcohol drinkers galore. Sunshines and rainbows are a thing of fairy tales, not Scotland.
Some people prefer to keep the best tools hidden for the right time. This barber was ready to pull out his best equipment and it was too much for his client to handle. Quality over quantity is the name of the game with this Scottish person.
Freedom of expression and embrace of different people is huge in Scotland. Nobody truly cares where you’re from as long as you’re respectful and can have a good time. Just be careful not to piss off that one random Scottish person on the street.
