People usually assume that being in a relationship is more expensive than being out of one. After all, stereotypes say that once you have a significant other, you’ll be spending tons of money buying them gifts. But a recent study shows that’s not exactly the case.
GiftsCards.com surveyed 1,000 people who ranged from single to married to in a steady relationship. It asked them how much they spent in an average month on romantic occasions and gifts. The survey factored in the cost of dates, as well as outings with significant others, gifts, and more. It yielded some interesting results.
The conclusion? First dates are pricier than anything else.
The study concluded that single people are actually more likely to spend more on dates in an average month. They beat out those in relationships by $7, spending an average of $146 a month. Unmarried people in relationships averaged $139, while married couples came last at only $130 a month.
In fact, the study showed that the longer a relationship continued, the less partners spent on one another. There’s a reason why the beginning of a relationship is called the honeymoon period —couples tend to spend more on one another and go on more dates. There was also a big discrepancy between the sexes on how much they spent on their partner.
In the first six months of a relationship, men spent $279 on their partners every month on average. This dropped to almost half ($148) by the third year of a relationship. Women tended to spend much less on their partners even at the beginning of dating, starting at $90 and dropping to $58 in the same period.
But don’t worry: The honeymoon period isn’t the end.
However, just because couples tend to spend less money on one another as relationships continue does not mean that the magic disappears. They may simply find cheaper activities that they enjoy doing together, such as cooking together, going for walks, or binging on a favorite Netflix series. As life becomes busier and couples build a life together that includes careers, households, in-laws, and children, they may also prioritize spending time together at home rather than going on expensive dates.
“Studies show that people get a lot more lasting happiness when they spend their money on experiences rather than things, and I think that’s an important distinction to make here,” said Dayana Yochim, a financial specialist for NerdWallet. “Even if it’s a bad date, you have a story. You have something to laugh about or cry about with your friends.”
Married couples are big spenders when it comes to going out.
However, the study also found that married couples spent more when they did go out on a date together. Their average date expenses were $54, while single people and dating people dropped to $43 and $44, respectively.
The study made another telling discovery: The amount a person spends on their significant other might show how serious they are about a relationship. Generally, people tend to spend more on partners they are actively invested in. This doesn’t necessarily sound the death knell for people who don’t spend a lot of money on their significant other.
The study did not account for income levels. Millennials, for example, have lower and more fluctuating income, so they may be forced to find other ways to show their partners that they care. Couples in their 20s and 30s often don’t have a lot of disposable income, so they may prefer to spend time at home together or doing free or lower-cost activities.
If dating is out of your budget, don’t panic.
Yochim said that there’s nothing wrong with being upfront with potential dates if they suggest an outing that’s beyond your price range. After all, you’re going out to get to know one another, not the menu at the most expensive restaurant in town.
“You can say, ‘Hey, that sounds great, but how about something more casual?’” Yochim said. “‘Or something that’s not going to make me wonder if I can cover my rent.’”
What the study did show was that many people are happier to spend money on partners they would consider marrying. This holds especially true for holidays, birthdays, anniversaries, and other special occasions. Twenty dollars was the cost difference for Valentine’s Day between couples who were more likely to get married than others.
Many millennials are getting creative when it comes to date ideas.
None of this changes the fact that a lot of young people just can’t afford to go out on expensive dates these days. For millennial couples, low-cost, casual options are replacing pricey restaurants and high-end cultural experiences. Thankfully, there are a lot of cheap or free ways to have a fun time with your date without breaking the bank.
If finances are an issue, you don’t have to cancel dates. Lunch dates are usually much cheaper than dinner dates. You’ll get to know your date just as well over a sandwich and a bowl of soup as you will over filet mignon.
And frankly, if they aren’t interested in cheap dates, then they might not be worth a second date.
If you are interested in cultural events or other outings in your area, there are plenty of opportunities to find a cheap or discount day. Many theaters, museums, and even zoos offer free days. Keep an eye on the events in your area to see if you can score a day that you and your partner can enjoy without putting a strain on your wallet. You can also rent some bicycles in a park or hit a local music festival for a low fee.
There are tons of online and mobile resources to help you find affordable dates, too. Apps like Groupon make it easy to find fun, unique events in your area for a fraction of their usual cost. And don’t worry, you’re still investing in your date — just investing the time of looking for something that will interest you both and make for a fun outing, rather than investing lots of money.
So, are you destined for the single life if you’re broke?
Still stumped for low-cost date options? You can always stay in. Cook together, watch a movie, do a puzzle, or play a board game. The real point of your time together is to find out how you click.
Thankfully, what all of this doesn’t mean is that your relationship is destined for failure if you’re not wealthy. Low-cost dates are just as much of an investment as expensive ones. Ultimately, it comes down to an investment of time rather than money.
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